The Patriarchy

For this first full blog post we're going to explain the idea of female privilege, which is more appropriately termed benevolent sexism, as this is something we find often in the social life of the university setting.

A few examples of stories that may seem as though they are instances of female privilege:

- Women frequently receive free drinks and dinners while men are expected to pay for alcohol and food.
- Men are expected to hold doors for women and display other acts of courtesy.

- Women are allowed into all frat parties. Men must be a member of the frat in order to enter the party.

- Women are socially allowed to wear make up and expose skin. If men were to do these things, they would be called derogatory terms.

These are not examples of female privilege because being a woman is not the base marker for receiving attention or privileges; a woman receives free drinks when she flirts with a man, she is allowed into a party when she is dressed provocatively, she has the door held for her when she smiles and is charming. Are you noticing the connection between how and why she is rewarded? That's right. She is rewarded when her actions make her more sexually available.

Where do these rules come from? The patriarchy, of course! In case you're slipping into lazy idiot mode, I'll explain that the patriarchy is not a panel of old white men sitting around and deciding what is allowed and what is not. That would be far too easy to destroy. The patriarchy is a set of standards and rules that are upheld by society that favor the masculine and degrade the feminine. Men who adhere to masculine norms are rewarded while those who deviate are punished. Women who can navigate the tricky difficulties of femininity are rewarded, and those who go too far masculine are punished. Here's a fun comic!

(courtesy Sinfest)

What makes benevolent sexism so evil is that it's not rewarding to all women: it's rewarding to women who behave in a certain way, and that way upholds the patriarchal standards of what is appropriate behavior.

Not only is in rewarding to women who behave in a certain way, but it is rewarding specifically to white women who behave in a certain way. Women of color are far too sexualized to frequently benefit from benevolent sexism. Under the rules of the patriarchy, white women are the most prized possession. Look around the campus and see how Asian women are fetishized, or how black women are rejected. Dare me to tell you about the time my roommate wasn't let into a party because she's black, or the time two white guys yelled slurs at my Asian friends as we were walking. Ask me about it because I'd love to tell you.

The last point I'll make about benevolent sexism is that there is still a power dynamic structure at play here. Men offer to pay for dinner, they offer to buy drinks, some of them even offer additional cash for dates, because they think a woman is something that can be purchased, or at least rented. Men think a woman's company is for sale. It are not. Our company has an infinite value, and being payed for it cheapens the quality of living.

Those men, and anyone who complains that feminism isn't real because women don't need to pay for dinners? Those men can go fuck themselves.